The dreaded Survey calls again!


I recently sent a bouquet of flowers to my daughter’s office address in the far-away, distant South of London. I bought them online, and thought no more about the subject. I learned that my gift had arrived, my daughter liked the flowers; and, well, that was that! Or so I thought!

I received a confirmation e-mail thanking me for my order, I received another e-mail telling me that my order had been dispatched; well and good, but now I have three more e-mails from the same company telling me how delighted they were to get my money, and would I fill in a ‘teensy-weeny Ten Minute’ survey on how well they had done by doing their jobs!

If I hadn’t been satisfied with their work, or the flowers had all drooped or died, or any other complication had occurred, I would have been straight on my computer telling them that I was dissatisfied, and probably wanted my money back, but I was happy! So why the bleeding questionnaire; why the interminable quest to get ‘feedback’?

Trouble is, e-mails are too easy to send. If you had to phone, or write a letter to ask if a customer was happy, you probably would not send the damn letter! So why the  constant call for reassurance that everything was ‘painless’ and ‘enjoyable’. How silly can a company get?  I ordered the flowers, yes; but how was I supposed to feel? Like I had just completed an orgasm? Daft pillocks!

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