Amongst writers, there is a long-acknowledged truth that fiction cannot compare with the truly fascinating truths of reality. I mean, where in the whole world of fiction would you get a plot where an American film star imports two scrappy, undocumented, unquarantined dogs when he arrives on his private jet to act in a movie in Australia. Australia, where they have television series detailing the efforts of Customs people to stop Chinks, Muslims and other clowns importing rat bodies for comfort food!
Then, in true ‘Big Brother’ fashion, the Immigration Minister states that the actor has fifty-odd hours to remove the two dogs, as in ‘Countdown to Depp dog death deadline’ or else its ‘The Big Sleep’ for ‘Pistol and Boo’ (that is what the bloody animals are named; I didn’t make this bit up either).
So the Opposition then climbs onto its electronic soapbox, and states that the real reason the bloody dogs are in Australia in the first place is becoz of all the austerity cuts in the bloody biosecurity Border Force, mate!
But the best is yet to be told.
An online petition calling on the minister to save the dogs was signed by more than 600 people in its first hour.
The author of the petition, 27-year old Sydney woman Namita Sopal, told Guardian Australia she hoped it would start an online movement to put pressure on the government to withdraw its “cruel” threat.
“I love dogs and I thought it was crazy, so that was my motivation,” she said.
as well as :-
Earlier this month, animal welfare groups called on the environment minister, Greg Hunt, to deny film-makers permits for two capuchin monkeys who were due to perform in the new Depp movie, which is in production on the Gold Coast.
The activists said importing the animals from the US to Australia would cause them significant physical and psychological distress.
I’ve sussed the plot out. Johnny Depp was planning to use Pistol and Boo as ‘stand-ins’ for the two banned capuchin monkeys, and worst of all, he wasn’t going to pay them anything at all!